Author Archives: scott

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Surfer Doctor: Season 2, Episode 8

Tonight on Surfer Doctor: Things seem OK between Surfer Doctor and Secret Knowing Resident but then Secret Knowing Resident tells him she actually prefers the TV miniseries version of The Shining so Surfer Doctor declines to join her environmental activist group in liberating some rabbits from a makeup factory then Surfer Doctor hears on the hospital security guard’s police scanner that the group has been arrested so he goes to bail her out and learns she never made it to the factory and he heads to her apartment but she’s not there and the door is open so he calls her again and hears her phone ring inside and Surfer Doctor goes in and finds her phone on the floor and her lockscreen picture is a photo of an ancient cave painting that looks a lot like a younger version of Surfer Doctor with his face raised to the sky bathed in silver light emanating from the heavens

Surfer Doctor: Season 2, Episode 7

Tonight on Surfer Doctor: While driving his biofuel-run VW camper back from riding the Big Moon Tide Surfer Doctor comes upon a tour bus on its side and sets Jack Johnson’s broken leg and splints it with a guitar neck and surfboard leash and Jack Johnson asks Surfer Doctor to travel the world with him as his concierge physician and tells him he’ll pay him enough money to set up clinics all over the world so Surfer Doctor has to think about it but when they get to the hospital a bunch of teenagers have poisoned themselves ingesting belladonna recreationally so Surfer Doctor creates an antidote from willow sap and palmetto bug carapace and Jack Johnson rescinds his offer saying the hospital needs Surfer Doctor more than he does but he promises to take the whole crew to Portugal to ride los supertubos as soon as he’s back on his feet

Surfer Doctor: Season 2, Episode 6

Tonight on Surfer Doctor: Morning finds Surfer Doctor sitting on his board and riding the swells yet despite the perfect tide and the ancient vine of rebirth braided into his ponytail he remains unsure of his karmic stability so he walks memory’s path back to his training in the jungle when the faceless ones spoke to him from the shadows and guided him to earn their knowledge and finds solace in the innocence of discovery until he’s jarred back to this plane by the sounds of another surfer being attacked by a shark so he catches a wave over and dives off his board and conjures an unpleasant biomagnetic vibration to harmlessly drive the shark away then packs the surfer’s wounds with chewed sea grasses and conch-slime and as he drags the surfer to the shore the surfer thanks him but it’s Surfer Doctor who feels the true joy and terrible burden of gratitude

Surfer Doctor: Season 2, Episode 5

Tonight on Surfer Doctor: Tension mounts among Surfer Doctor’s coworkers as Secret Knowing Resident begins sleeping with Surfboard Refusing Intern’s ex Pill Stealing Custodian and no one can go to Surfer Doctor for guidance because Surfer Doctor is in vibrational disharmony and Pill Stealing Custodian begins to go through withdrawal at work so one of them lets him into the pharmacy to take the edge off but he gets caught stealing pills and is arrested and some hospital board members tell Surfer Doctor he must choose which coworker will take the fall and Secret Knowing Resident volunteers to leave saying it will solve all of Surfer Doctor’s problems but the universe whispers truth to Surfer Doctor so he tearfully dismisses Surfboard Refusing Intern and she smiles and says you’re not so out of sync after all and leaves and Surfer Doctor goes to his shack for a meditative search for clarity and there’s a note stuck to the surfboard that Surfboard Refusing Intern refused in her handwriting saying this will always be who you are

Surfer Doctor: Season 2, Episode 4

Tonight on Surfer Doctor: An ancient catacomb is discovered under the city and Surfer Doctor joins the exploration team but two of the prison inmates on the digging crew fight and cause a mudslide that kills one of them and traps Surfer Doctor with the other and the inmate tells Surfer Doctor how sorry he is he’ll die before apologizing for hitting a little girl while driving drunk and putting her in a wheelchair then he passes out from lack of oxygen but Surfer Doctor notices a trickle of water from an underground reservoir and pulls on some load-bearing roots to open a torrent that clears the exit and sweeps Surfer Doctor and the inmate to safety so Surfer Doctor takes the inmate to apologize to the parents of the girl and they forgive him and the inmate tells Surfer Doctor that while he was unconscious he had a vision that Surfer Doctor will soon face a test that will determine whether he ever surfs again