Listen, I’ll get right to it:
I have said some really, really, REALLY derogatory stuff about Family Guy over the years.
Like, really derogatory. Foul, even. So foul that my wife, who thinks Family Guy is about as funny as screening Schindler’s List against the side of a burning pediatrics ward full of abandoned AIDS babies, has given me shit about talking so much shit about a show that seems to play in our house almost constantly.
(I have tried to explain to her that I need a familiar “sonic blanket” of bland white noise to envelop me while I work, and that having Family Guy on is like having the worst, most predictable moments from every sitcom I watched as a kid during the ’80s playing at once, but maybe I’m telling it wrong.)
I am not sorry for saying such terrible things about Family Guy, and so I will not apologize for that. I do want to apologize, though, for the possibility that someone might have heard me talking shit about Family Guy, and inferred that you, Seth MacFarlane, the individual, are not funny by association.
Because I just got around to seeing the season premiere of SNL and you–Seth MacFarlane, a guy directly responsible for an awful show so infrequently funny, its rare laugh-inspiring moments are unworthy of the pain that went into their production, like blood diamonds of comedy–FREAKING KILLED IT. Like, Justin Timberlake killed it. Like, Family Guy-offsetting killed it.
So, yeah, if my incessant, almost pathological tirades against Family Guy‘s existence might have given even a single person the idea that you, yourself, Seth MacFarlane, are not funny, I apologize.
I just wanted to tell you that.
Also, American Dad is awesome.