Dearest Glee,

Thanks so much for not coming anywhere near the Southeast on your upcoming ultra-brief live tour. It’s not that I don’t like you, Glee; you know I do. It’s just that I’m in it more for the Jane Lynch and the snappy comedy writing than most of the musical numbers (more Queen!), and I don’t really think I’d enjoy the live-in-concert version–which I would be morally obligated to take my wife to, should it occur within a couple hours’ driving distance of our house.

But it’s not.

Thanks for that.

Looking forward to catching up in April. See you then.